So many thoughts come to mind in seconds—
- Ebola. Probably not. (Not really fair to use ebola in a joke. Too soon. Ebola is not funny. Tragic and horrible disease. Moving on…)
- Car crash.
- Lover’s quarrel gone wrong. Or wonderfully right…
- Firing range mishap, unexpected recoil meets face.
- Currently hidden alcoholism results in Pat O’Brien-like stair falling. Lips meet landing.
- Closet superhero. Big battle last night with a supervillian. You should see the supervillian.
- Second job as a lightweight boxer. Well, we don’t know her weight so that’s an assumption.
- Attempt as plastic self-surgery.
- No bottle opener results in crazy accident from overestimation of teeth strength.
- It was far worse this morning. Didn’t think we’d notice it.
- Rudeness to the makeup person never pays off.
- Tomorrow she will be full zombie.
- Suffers from APA (Adult Pacifier Addiction).
- Pulled car a distance of 11 feet earlier using her mouth. Previous record holder never cleaned the mouth thingy.
- The curse from the witch she did a story on six years ago is taking hold.
- Halloween costume didn’t get fully cleaned off before air time. Thanks, Bob, for the careful look when I asked if it was all off…
- What, you don’t like my pimple-stickers? Most fads takes off slowly…
PS: CNN—give a girl a day off! You can’t hide that sort of thing. If it didn’t matter you wouldn’t use so much makeup on people on TV.